Parrot

An elderly woman bought a parrot.
The woman asked if it would
behave if she took it to church with
her on Sundays.

The owner said it shouldn't be a problem, that
she could put him on her shoulder and he
would stay there.
She bought the parrot, and the next week she put him
on her shoulder and went off to
church. Just as everyone quieted down and
the sermon began, the parrot looked
around, squawked and
said, "It's goddamned cold in here!"

Everyone turned to look at her, she
ran out of the church in total embarrassment!
The next day, she returned
to the pet store and explained the
embarrassing situation to
the owner.

The owner offered the following solution,
"If the parrot does that again, grab
him by the legs and swing
him around 5 times and return him to you shoulder.
So, the next Sunday she took the parrot to church and sure
enough, just as the sermon started, the parrot squawked,
"It's goddamned cold in here!"

Without any hesitation, the woman
grabbed his legs, swung him around 5
times, and placed him
back on her shoulder.

The parrot shook his head,
ruffled his feathers and said,
"Pretty fucking windy, too!"